Post-baby survival kit

One of my good friends is expecting her first baby (about a month before mine! I'm so excited!!!) anyways, we recently got into a Facebook conversation about what to expect after the baby arrives, and I started to recall all the little things you may need, but that nobody really tells you about. While  I was at the hospital, My cousin's wife brought me a big bag with "post-baby survival items". A lot of the stuff that was in there, I thought "why do I need this?" And wouldn't you know it? I used everything in that bag! I was surprised by the recovery process, I didn't realize that it would take as long as it did, and I wasn't expecting a lot of the "side-effects" of giving birth. I found that I was spending a lot of time on the couch and having to send Bryant out several times a day to the store for things we hadn't thought we would need. So I've come up with my own list of post baby survival items.

*Disclaimer*

I had a doctor-assisted birth in a hospital. I also had an epidural and was given an episiotomy. I breast fed for 6 months, until my daughter self-weaned and I co-slept with her for 6 months. I understand that the recovery period and side effects are different for different styles of labor and delivery. And my parenting styles and decisions are different from everyone else's. This is just a list I compiled based on my own experiences. They are in no particular order, and make sure to talk to your doctor first about using anything.

Witch Hazel- I had an episiotomy. This was probably the hardest part of my recovery because, lets face it, stitches in that area are no fun. The nurse who assisted me my first night in the hospital recommended witch hazel. You can find pads called Tucks Pads at the pharmacy. I would put 2 or 3 on a pad after every bathroom use. To make them even more soothing, stick them in the fridge!

Ice Packs- again, for the episiotomy. Plus, you will be really swollen, and this help lessen the swelling. While at the hospital, the nurses would give me latex gloves that were frozen. Genius!

Pain Relief Spray- I forget the brand that I used, but ask the nurse for some. They will have it there. It basically just makes everything cold and numb. You can also find this in the pharmacy, usually in the first aid area, by sunburn creams and sprays.

Depends Diapers and Overnight Pads- NO ONE prepared me for how much you bleed after delivery. The nice thing about pregnancy is you don't have a period for 9 months, but you more than make up for that during the 4-6 weeks after having a baby. I'm not kidding guys, it took 6 weeks for me to stop bleeding. The first 2 weeks were the worst of it. After that it lessens, but its still annoying. This is because your uterus is going back to its original size, and its getting rid of all that extra tissue. While at the hospital, the nurses will give you these crazy HUGE mesh underwear. ASK FOR EXTRAS when you leave!!! Also ask for extra pads. They are unbelievably huge, and kind of awkward to wear, but they are nice to have. After that, I recommend wearing those depends diapers. It sounds silly, but its a lot easier than changing a pad every hour. Also, keep in mind that breast feeding helps speed up your uterus to getting back to its normal size, which will speed up your recovery time. It's a win-win for everyone!

Lansinoh Cream- if you plan on breastfeeding, this stuff is a life saver! They will give you a small tube at the hospital (if they don't, ask for some) this small tube is all you need. A little bit goes a looooong way. Breastfeeding for the first time can be a challenge, and possibly a little painful if you aren't latching correctly and this will keep you from cracking and getting raw. Before you leave the hospital, ask to meet with a lactation specialist. Remember that if you are breastfeeding correctly, it may be a bit uncomfortable at first, but it shouldn't hurt. Also My daughter had extremely dry lips her first week or so, and I found putting a tiny bit on her chapped lips helped a ton too!

Snacks- I did not bring any snacks and that was a huge mistake! If you are having a baby in a hospital, they generally don't allow you to eat. I had Savannah at 9:20 pm and by then, the kitchen and grill at the hospital were closed. After having gone through labor, I was STARVING! The nurse was kind enough to find me a sandwich, some chips and some cookies, but I wolfed it down and was still hungry. I paged the nurse around 3 am begging for food, and all she could get me were some Lorna Doons. I fully plan on bringing several snacks this next time!

A stool softener- I know this is getting into uncomfortable territory, but I'm just being honest. All the medication they give you after having a baby, plus your body going through a major change really quickly, will make you constipated, if you have an episiotomy, going to the bathroom could be painful. Stool softeners will help!

Water!!!!- Be sure to drink TONS of water post-delivery. You will be a little dehydrated (ask your hubby to feed you ice chips while in labor. I was surprised how thirsty I got!) and you need to replenish your body. They say that labor is like a marathon, and you wouldn't go through a marathon with no water! Also, if you choose to breastfeed, I found that keeping a tall glass of ice water with me while I fed my daughter helped a ton!


Just a few more tips:

     The first few weeks are an adjustment. Especially with sleep schedules. Be prepared to get up several times during the night to feed you baby. This wasn't as bad as people made it out to be, at least in my opinion, I co-sleep with Savannah for about 5 or 6 months. This was nice, because as soon as she began to fuss, I could feed her, while staying in bed and laying down. I would try to doze a little bit while she ate. During the day, I tried to sleep when she did. Keep in mind that most babies sleep around 16 hours a day their first couple of months. Take advantage of this, and grab a nap when you can. (This will be harder with two kids, I'm sure, but its still worth a try!) When they are awake, keep in mind that they don't demand much. If I had to get something done, I had to learn not to feel bad about placing her in her swing or on a blanket with toys, while I cleaned or whatever. To keep her entertained, and so that I could better keep an eye on her, I moved her to wherever I was. That way we were still connecting and bonding, but I could get things done.

     Take it as easy as you can the first week. If you have friends or neighbors who want to make you dinner, arrange in advance who will bring what and when. Also, it's a good idea to make a few meals that are easy to freeze and store until you need them. And if you are like us, keep some of your favorite delivery food places on speed dial. Also, pick up some paper plates and plastic cups. That way, you cut down on dirty dishes. As for housework, enlist your spouse to pick up some of the slack, or a friend or relative. The day I came home from the hospital, my mom had caught up on all our laundry for us! It was so nice! If you don't have anyone nearby to help, let the nurses know before you leave the hospital. They can arrange for a nurse to come over and help!

     Speaking of nurses coming to help, some hospitals offer a program for a nurse to come visit you in your home after the first day or 2 back. They will bring you some information on basic baby care, lists of pediatricians in your area, a list of play groups, story times, support groups, lactation consultants, etc. it's so helpful! Plus it's a great time to voice any questions or concerns you may have. Ask about a program like this while at the hospital.

     Don't expect to be "super-mom" and that your baby will be perfect. Being born is kind of a crazy experience for a baby if you think about it. Suddenly there is light, and sounds are louder, and there is air and heat and cold. It can be confusing and scary. I was so unbelievably lucky to have a calm baby, who fully embraced her new surroundings. But not every baby is like this (I have a feeling that since I had such a good baby the first time, that this next one is going to be a wild child!) Just remember to keep your cool and practice patience. Find techniques that work for both you and the baby. For instance, Savy hated being swaddled. She would get fussy and wiggle and move until she was out of that blanket. However, she loved being in a frontal baby carrier while I walked around. She liked to be close and cuddled. Play around and see what works for the both of you.

     If you find that you are being overwhelmed and stressed out and frustrated, find someone who is willing to take the baby for you for a few hours and get out of the house. It's just as important to take care of yourself as it is the baby, and those first few weeks after birth are a hormone nightmare. If you feel like you have the "baby blues" and just cant seem to shake them, call your doctor immediately.

Then there is the issue of learning to breastfeed. Just remember, that even though the instinct is there, they still have to learn how to do it, just like you have to learn how to feed them. Some babies latch right away and do beautifully, others, like Savannah and I, take a few weeks to get it down perfectly. If you choose not to breastfeed, that's your decision, but just remember that it really is the best thing for both you and your baby. I breastfed for 6 months and really wished I could have gone longer, but between an inconsistent work and school schedule, my milk supply was dwindling, and once Savannah started solids, she became disinterested in it, and began to wean herself. After that, I just couldn't keep my supply up as much as I had hoped. But now that I'm not working, and I've cut my school time in half, I am fully looking forward to breastfeeding longer!!! But remember, it is ultimately your decision. You know whats best for you and your baby. There is a lot of pressure out there to exclusively breastfeed, but if you can't, or if like me, you can only do it for a little while, don't let people make you think you are being a bad mom.

     My #1 piece of advice is to not worry. Labor and delivery is tough, but its not nearly as bad as some people try to tell you it is. If it really was so awful and terrible, people would only have 1 kid! The more relaxed you are, and the more educated you are going into it, the better your body will react and the easier it will be. I had a really great birthing experience because I went in with no expectations. I know a lot of people put together a very specific birth plan, and thats fine for them, but I felt that I just wanted to be comfortable, and I didnt want to be worrying that everything wasn't going "exactly my way". I just let the doctors and nurses do what they do best, and I asked lots of questions. If you do have a specific request, make sure you let them know ASAP. I was feeling ready to push and the nurse kept telling me it was too early to push and I was only at an 8 when they checked me a half hour before. When I finally told her that I needed to push now, she agreed. Low and behold, I had jumped the last 2 centimeters and that baby was ready to come!

     I attended a 4 week birthing class and there was one girl who was so scared of labor and delivery that she left the class crying several times. As I was getting ready to leave one class, I saw the nurse that was teaching, pull her aside and I will always remember what she said: "It's better to be prepared for the worst and realize it wasn't that bad, but if you stress too much about it, you will make it harder than it should be" Remember that this is one of the most amazing experiences you will ever have in your life, so see it as a good thing, and not something terrifying!

Sooooo, yeah, there is my list. I hope that it at least helps 1 person out there.  I'm by no means an expert, seeing as I've only gone through 1 labor so far, but I hope it contributes in some small way. If anyone else can think of anymore tips or things to add to the list, leave it in the comments so other people can see them as well!

Also, here is a post I wrote my last couple of weeks while pregnant with Savannah about what to expect during pregnancy. If you're interested, click HERE